It's A Love Story
by DaydreaminAri
Summary: Something about him makes me feel like I'm about to fall. Or turn into liquid. Or burst into flames. Something about him make me shiver at every touch. Every soft smile. Every single look. And this feeling... it only grows stronger. (Previously called Ferris Wheel)
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue –**

"I love you… You know that, right?" He smiles, pressing his forehead against mine. I nod slowly leaning into his body, trusting him enough to hold me there. His arms were strong as they wrapped around me, pulling me in as close as I could possibly get. I felt safe in his arms. His smell made me feel secure; the combination of sweat, cologne, and that musty, boyish smell that only men have. I could have stayed like this forever, but I knew what he did, and there was no forgetting it.

It took me a moment to get the words out, but I did, "I love you too…"

There are moments I wish I could just forget everything, moments I wish never happened, but I know they did. I know he never meant to hurt me. I know that when he says 'I love you', he really does mean it, but sometimes I wonder how much. I love him too, but our feelings are never the same, and they never will be. No matter how hard I try, I can never completely forgive him, but I always seem to keep going back to him.

"Why did you do it?" I ask, pulling away from him and standing about a foot back. I felt like I was repeating myself. In a way I guess I was. I had asked him time and time again why, but he always said the same old thing. He said he was sorry and it was a mistake and he would never do it again.

"I'm sorry… I don't know, I guess I wasn't thinking." He looks at me, pleading, with his big brown eye. "It was in the spur of the moment! I swear… Please forgive me. I love you so much…"

"You slept with her… That wasn't just in the spur of the moment. It's not like it was a simple kiss. It's not like you said no. You went home with her. You slept with her. You cheated on me! And the worst part is, this isn't the first time…" I look down at my shoes. Every part of me wants to slap him and walk away, but there was something keeping me here. It wasn't the urge to fight or argue, it was the urge to forgive him even though I couldn't. It was the urge to kiss him and apologize for yelling at him and questioning him. But that was where I went wrong all the other times. I forgave him and apologized for something I didn't do, I apologized for something he did.

I wasn't going to let that happen again. This time, this time would be different. This time, I was going to end it. No matter what my heart, or my brain, or my whatever, was saying, I was done.

"I can't do this anymore, Jason… I'm sorry." I force the words out in a hushed voice before turning around and walking away without a single glance back.

Chapter 1-

"I just can't do it anymore. It's every other week! He says he loves me then her goes off and screws some other chick. I honestly don't understand men sometimes!" I cry out sitting on the bed next to Robbie.

Robbie has been my best friend since we were 6. I remember the first time we met. It was the first week of July and the day before 4th of July, LA had this carnival in the Valley. I was running around with my mom and begging her to buy me cotton candy, and she did, but minutes later I dropped it. Then this little curly haired boy came up to me and gave me his. That was the start of something great.

"He was a dick anyway. I told you that from the beginning." He chuckles trying to lighten the conversation and make me laugh.

"I guess you were right all along." I laugh back.

"I always am." He puts his arm around me and pulls me in for a big hug, before we fall back onto the bed. I curl up next to him and lay my head on his chest and cry my eyes out for the next hour.

He understood what I was going through. His first real girlfriend was a two-timing piece of garbage, and when he found out, it crushed him.

Sometimes I don't know what I would do without him. He meant the world to me, and I think I was the same for him. As I think to myself, I start to notice the hardness of his chest and stomach, and I can feel the outline of the well toned body under his shirt. The rise and fall of his chest made me was to fall asleep. It was like floating in the ocean, letting the small waves roll under you. It felt relaxing… it felt right.

"Why don't we go downstairs and get some ice cream? Maybe watch a movie? How about it?" He smiles down at me, rubbing small circles on my lower back.

I simply smile and nod, pushing myself up off of him, and walking out of his room. He follows me down the stairs and towards his kitchen. This place was like my own home, so it didn't matter if I went into his freezer for food.

I pick up the tub of chocolate ice cream, every girls comfort food, and place it on the counter. He grabs two spoons and walks over to the couch. I didn't even bother getting bowls, because we would finish it by the time the movie was over.

"A full tub of ice cream and The Notebook… This is perfect." I smile grabbing a spoon from his hand.

"The Notebook again? This is like the 500th time!" He wines falling onto the couch beside me and taking a spoonful of ice cream. He always laughs at the way I eat my ice cream, because I flip the spoon upside down and pull it off with my tongue. He isn't so much laughing at the way I eat it, but the way I drop it on myself every once and a while.

"Don't drop it Kitty Cat." He teases, poking me in the side making me flinch. The ice cream flies off of the spoon and onto his shirt.

"Looks like that backfired!" I start hysterically laughing. He looks down at his shirt and laughs along with me.

"I'm going to go and get a paper towel…" He starts to get up, but I pull him back down.

"You're not wasting my ice cream!" I say leaning over and licking it off of his shirt.

"Well that wasn't awkward…" He says smearing some melted ice cream all over my cheek. "You want me to get that for you?" He says leaning over kissing me on the cheek. He then gets up and grabs a paper towel and wipes the rest off my face.

"Ok lover boy, now sit and watch the movie!" I slap at his hands. It's always been obvious that Robbie liked me. I mean, every friendship is like that. The guy always has something for the girl. I don't know how I feel though and I've explained that. He's never made a "move" on me before and he's always very polite about it.

We watched the movie again, and occasionally I would curl up into his side, especially at the sad parts. I would cry and look up at him to see the tears welling in his eyes too, because it's that emotional of a movie. Not even the toughest man could get through it, and if you could, you're heartless.

"So what now?" I ask him.

"Want to stay over? It's almost 2 in the morning. It's not to safe to drive at this time." He explains, but I know he just wants me to stay.

"Not safe?" I laugh, and then continue, "But, yea, that's probably a good idea. I should head up the guest room. I'll see you in the morning."

I get up and walk up the stairs towards the spare room across from Robbie's. The bed was freshly made, and the room smells like roses. There is a window overlooking the front yard, over on the right of the room. It was late, and no cars were out.

I climb into the bed and pull the covers over myself. I could hear the murmur of crickets from outside the window, and it was quite relaxing.

I hear the door creak open and a small smile comes over me. The door closes again and I can feel his footsteps coming across the room. He pulls the covers away on the opposite side of the bed and climbs in next to me. I roll over to face him and smile.

"Hey…" I whisper. "I was wondering how long it was going to take you."

"Listen… I'm really sorry about you and Jason…" Robbie speaks up, but still in a whisper. "But, I have to tell you that I'm still really happy it happened. Not him cheating on you, but you ending it with him. You deserve someone so much better and –"

I cut him off, "Robbie, I told you, I don't want to ruin everything between us. I've seen one fight end things with people. I've seen relationships that have gone on for years, end in a matter of minutes, and I don't want to lose you as my best friend. You're the only one I have…"

"I know. And I'm not trying to saw that. If in a few years you want to try it, I'll wait, but if not that's fine. I'm just saying that there are so many other guys out there who are better for you and who will treat you right, and those are the people you should be with. Not that dick, Jason. Don't go back to him okay?" He stares at me forcing me to promise.

"I won't, I swear. I'm done with him." I say sliding over and resting my head on his bicep, with my face to his chest, breathing in his scent.

I knew somewhere inside there was that longing feeling. The one every girl has with a guy like Robbie, but I was absolutely terrified of what would happen between us if anything went wrong.

I look back up at him and smile, seeing the boy who's been in love with me since 6, out cold next to me smiling like a 5 year old in a candy shop. His curls were handing over his face, shadowing the one thing I wanted to see while I fell asleep. I slowly and softly bring my hand up to his face and brush aside the curls, hoping not to wake him. Once his face was reveled, I softly whispered 'goodnight' and shut my eyes. I replayed the first time we met over and over again in my head, hoping I could go back to that day. It was the day I met the person I would be friends with forever.

The morning came sooner than I wanted it to. I just wanted to lie in bed all day, which I could because it was a Saturday, but I knew it wasn't right. I roll over to face Robbie, whose eyes flutter open. He smiles softly, and whispers, "Good morning beautiful…"

"Robbie…" I feel the blood rush to my face.

"I'm not flirting. I'm being honest. I've never met someone so perfect." He sighs, knowing he hasn't won.

"Robbie!" I shout softly.

"Ok, fine. If you don't want the compliment, then don't take it. I'm going to go get ready." He throws off the sheets roughly.

"That's not what I meant! I just… I thought we've been over this before. For one thing, I just got over a bad break up! I'm not ready!" I pause.

"That's not what it's about Cat." He turns away, but I get up and grab his wrist, turning him to me.

"I know. I love you, you know that, but you're pretty much the only friend I've ever had, and I'm not going to lose that. You told me last night you wouldn't do this if I swore to never go back to Jason. You need to promise me you won't make this harder than it already is. I don't want to break your heart; I don't want to lose you. Please understand that, and just let go…" I sigh leaning into him for a hug.

"Ok. I'm not going to be happy about it, but ok. Anything for you…" He wraps his arms around me and squeezes lightly.

"Thank you." I let out a sigh of relief. I know this is tearing him apart, but it's better this way, than any other.


	2. Chapter 2

So listen... I really really am sorry, but i screwed up my hand a few days ago and its been getting worse and worse, and now i can hardly type because i screwed it up more yesterday. So i don't exactly know when i will be updating, but i swear to you, that the second i can, I will update, and it will be good.

I really hope you dont hate me for the rest of your lives and stop reading. I'm sorry. Just be patient with me and i will do everything i can to get something up soon.


	3. Chapter 3

Walking into school was always the worst part of the day. We were only aloud to walk in through one pair of double doors, so everyone was pushing and shoving to get it. The entire time you would hobble like penguins, stepping slowly side to side, only scooting up little by little. But the worst was when it would rain. Everyone was in a hurry to get into the building, and it only made it more violent.

Robbie was by my side the entire time though today. He gave me the room to walk a little more freely than usually, by letting himself get pummeled by guys 3 times his size. I guess that's what I loved about him; he was always so sweet and outgoing.

"I swear one day, I'm going to break that kid's leg." Robbie says once we're in the school.

"Don't say that." I chuckle slightly before leaning into him for a quick hug before we go our separate ways. "I'll see you 4th period!"

"Can I talk to you for a minute first. I know you might be late, but it's kind of important." He says shaking slightly.

"Yea what's up?"

"I was wondering if tonight…or whenever you m-might want to… Um, you know what, never mind. I'll talk to you about it later." He says turning around and walking quickly away.

"Okay." I shout to him half way down the hallway. I turn and head to homeroom, looking forward to 4th period.

The rest of the day go by rather quickly, but at the end of 11th, my phone buzzes. I pull it out of the back pocket of jeans and unlock the screen.

**_Hey – Unknown_**

The message was vague so I couldn't figure out who it was from, so I reply.

**_Who are you? – Cat_**

I slide the phone back into my pocket not expectation them to reply back. It was more than likely a wrong number or something like that. Seconds after I put it back in my pocket, it buzzes again.

**_Check your locker. – Unknown_**

**_No thanks. Who are you? – Cat_**

**_Check it. – Unknown_**

I start to walk past my locker and towards the Asphalt Café, but who ever this was wanted me to check my locker, and it was intriguing me. Nothing horrible could be in there, were in a well protected school.

I walk over to the flower covered locker and pull the slide to the side and pull open the locker. Lying across the top of my books was a white rose. There were no thorns on it, but two leave were on the stem.

My phone buzzes again, after I pick up the rose and smell it. It smelled fresh and beautiful. I pull out my phone and look at the text that popped up.

**_A white rose to symbolize your perfection, purity, and innocence. – Unknown_**

I smile at the text, and grab the binders I will need for my homework. Another text comes in.

**_Check your science binder. – Unknown_**

I stop and sit on a bench the school had just put in all around the school. I take my science binder out from the pile of books and binders I had, and then put the rest next to me. There was a red heart in the pocket.

**_For your energy, passion, and action when it comes to everyday life goals. Next it the handicap stall of the girls bathroom. – Unknown_**

I leave my things there and race to the bathroom. The door of the handicap stall was closed, but there were no feet I could see, so I crawled under. On an angle across the back of the door was written "Orange!"

**_For your adventurous personality. – Unknown_**

**_Meet me at La Bella Luna_****_ tonight at 6. Wear something nice _****_J_****_ – _****_Unknown_**

I leave the bathroom and go towards my car. I rushed home to find some sort of dress to wear and to take a shower.

My mom wasn't home yet, so I couldn't get an opinion on what to wear. My closet was full of dresses, but they didn't feel special enough to wear tonight. The whole thing was so mysterious and romantic; a simple dress just wouldn't cut it.

It was practically like the movies. I was picking things out and throwing them over my head and across the room until I found the right one. It was a blue strapless dress, just about knee length. On the top, across the chest were fake crystal like jewels forming swirled patterns.

I jump in the shower and let the warm water run down my head and neck for a minute, before finishing up quickly and starting on my hair. I make a small French braid from the top side of my head, over to the back and tie it up together with the rest into a bun. Cut but simple.

After a little bit of make, I'm throwing on my heels and I'm out the door. It was 5:45 and I lived about 10 minutes away from the restaurant.

The front was outdoor tables filled with people and white Christmas tree lights dangling everywhere. I walk into the restaurant twirling my hair nervously. A man walks up to me and smiles. He was dressed in all black with a white tie, and looked to be in his mid 30's.

"Are you Cat?" The man asks.

"Yes. Are you my date?" I chuckle nervously praying he wasn't.

"No." The man laughs. "But your date is this way." He say leading me over to the back of the restaurant. He stopped right next to a staircase. A banner was hanging across the top of the doorway. On it said, "Come Shout From The Roof Tops With Me."

I climbed the 3 flights of stairs it required to get to the roof top. I push open the steel door that lead to the roof and a cold gust of air blows across me, making me shiver lightly. A man was standing at the edge of the building turned away from me. I wasn't sure who it was, but those curls were had to mistake for someone else.

He turned around and stared at me. His mouth almost hit the floor. "You look beautiful…"

"You clean up well yourself." I say looking down at my shoes. I walk over to the table and take a seat across from him. "What is this Robbie?"

"What?"

"You know what I'm talking about." I pause, looking a little mad. "This is nice. Really nice."

"I know, I was thinking about steeling the plate." He cuts me off.

"Robbie…" I say quietly.

"Ok… And that's a problem because?" He questions.

"Because once again you're trying to say something without actually saying it. And it's driving me nuts." I explain.

"I think you lost me." He says trying to act dumb, hoping I wouldn't catch on. He was never that great of an actor though.

"No I don't think I did. I think you know exactly what I'm talking about. We've gone through this before. You tried to kiss me the other night…" I tell him.

"Did I?" He asks me stupidly, still trying to save his cover.

"Damn it Robbie. You asked me out of a date without even asking me out on a date." I say bluntly. He sighs a little bit. "Now if this keeps going this way, if we can't communicate… and we've been over this, where you never say what you mean, I don't know how we're going to—"

He cuts me off mid sentence, not with a kiss, but with something so blunt he might as well have said I'm in love with you. "I don't want to be here right now…"

My face completely changed. My smirk dropped to a complete and utter look of despair. I looked down for a moment, but he kept his eyes locked to mine.

"What…?" I whispered looking at him.

"I want to be at my place right now…with you…" He locked eyes with me, refusing to look away. His straight face drove the point home, but I just stared at him with my jaw on the ground.

"Robbie…"

"Cat, maybe I'm not being blunt enough yet. Since the day I met you, I've been in love with you. But every time I try to show it, I can't. I'm unable to speak around you, unable to do anything because I'll end up looking like a spaz. I did this to try and show you everything I'm feeling. I get you might not want this, a relationship, but I'm here to change your mind." He spills.

I sigh slightly looking back down at the plate.

"We've been playing games this entire time. We're in love with each other and that's the hard core facts. Neither of us wanted to say it. But I'm saying it now… I love you Cat. I love you and I have since September 6, 2001, 13 years ago." He gets up and comes over to my side of the table. He takes my hand in his and pulls me up towards him.

The paper lanterns were glowing white and red above our heads, twinkling like the stars. There were candles lighting the floor under us. I look back up at Robbie; his face was lit, a tinted red from the lanterns. He pulls me closer to him, and starts to sway to the music in the background. I know he was waiting for me to say it back, and I know everything he said was right, but I couldn't get the words out.

I stayed in his arms for a few moments swaying to the music, just enjoying the times before it had to end. But before it could end, he pushed my head up with the knuckle of his finger and places his lips on mine. It was soft and sweet, nothing too much, but it was perfect.

I pull back and look at his for a moment, shocked. A small smile comes over my face, and he pulls me back in and attacks my lips. Our tongues decided to take over from there, opening our lips slightly, and introducing themselves. I deepened the kiss just enough so that it was still acceptable to do in public, but enough to make my point. We stood there, in each other's arms for 10 minutes, just enjoying the company, and taking in the feelings we were overwhelmed with.

"Say those 3 words and I'm yours… I'll be yours forever." He whispers in my ear.

"I-I…" I tried but I couldn't get them out. I wanted to so badly it hurt, but I couldn't. He sighs and pulls away from me.

"Ok…" He turns around leaving me there on the open roof top with 2 plates full of food. He reaches to open the door, but I stop him in time.

"Wait!" I shout. He turns around and stares at me. "Everything I'm feeling right now is so new and I can't tell you how different it is to me. You mean the world to me… Know that. Please…"

"I know Cat…" He say holding back tears. "Those 3 words are all I need. But this game we've been playing for the past 13 years, it's starting to get old. I told you I love you… Now you tell me, do you love me, or is it just a game?"

I couldn't answer, so he opened the door and walked away. I stood there staring at the amazing set up of this date, and broke down, finally realizing what I just did. Not answering him was saying it was all a game.

**I'M BACK! Lol but yes, I'm back and ready to go. So I changed the title of this story, because I just completely changed the plot and it now has nothing to do with ferris wheels. But if any of you watched Gossip Girl when it was on, and you get the "3 words" thing and the "Do you love me or was it all just a game", then you will know where I'm going with this story. Chuck and Blair are amazing! Haha but yea, I'm back and I'll be posting a lot more because there's only 2 more days of school left!**

**My hand is fine now, just hurt the tendons and needed a good amount of rest. Had a brace for a while and I can't tell you how happy I am to be able to take it off! It was horrible. But yea, please continue reading and thanks to the one who do. I know I may have lost a few of you because it's been a while, but I'm back, so you should come back.**

**Thanks again! REVIEW! **


	4. Chapter 4

"Hey." I say walking into lunch the next day.

"Are you just going to act like nothing happened?" Robbie spits back. He glares at me for a moment then goes back to his food. The rest of the table looks back and forth between us and the rest of themselves.

"Well I'm not the one throwing important things at people expecting them to be okay with it! Maybe those words mean nothing to you, but they sure as hell mean something to me. You can't just throw around things like then. One day the egg will crack Robbie…" I argue back.

"At least I can say it. I'm not the one hiding behind a lie. You go around thinking that people will just do whatever you want, without wanting anything in return, but the truth is princess, THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN!" Robbie gets up and throws out his tray, then storms off.

"What the hell happened between you two?" Andre asks me. I roll my eyes and leave the table, all of my food still there. I wasn't hungry anymore. My appetite vanished, just like any feelings I had for Robbie.

I grab my bag from my locker and head for the door. My head felt clouded, and all I wanted to do was curl up in a corner and cry. I push open the steel door and try my best to make it to my car before breaking down. As I open the door, I hear someone shout. The voice was too familiar for me to forget. Every ounce of me wanted to ignore it, but I knew I couldn't.

"What are you doing."

"Going home. What the hell do you think I'm doing." I reply back.

"Cat, I didn't mean what I said. I'm sorry."

"Which part? The one where you told me I was a stuck up, self-centered bitch or the part where you told me you loved me?" I look him in the eyes, and all I saw was remorse, but I wasn't done yet.

"I-I…" He starts but stops. I wait a moment.

"I'd answer that wisely, if I were you." I chuckle to myself.

"I… I'm s-s." Robbie looks down at his feet unable to answer.

"You walk out on me when I can't say 'I love you' back, but the second you can't apologize, I should just let it go? You caught me off guard. Out of the blue, you told me you were in love with me and you wanted me to say it back, when I'm not even sure of how I feel?"

"I didn't mean for it to be like that… I just wanted to surprise you with a romantic night…" He steps closer to me.

"How is walking out on me romantic? The best thing you could have told me was, it was okay that I wasn't ready, or that I didn't have to say it now. But instead you blew up on me and left me on the rooftop alone…" I shake my head in disgust.

"I'm sorry…" He pauses, "I'm so sorry. It was too soon, I get it, and I won't try it again, but please just forgive me. I know were stronger than this. We have worked so hard to keep this fire going, and there is no point now on letting it burn out."

"Stop with the metaphors Robbie, it drives me insane. The fact of the matter here is, you spilled you heart to me and expected me to do the same. I wasn't ready for that so you left me alone on the rooftop. Do you not see the problem in that?" I pause, giving him a chance to answer.

"I do, and I'm really sorry. I just thought you were ready…" He sighs. Something about him makes me want to forgive him, just like something about him makes me feel like I'm about to fall. Or turn into liquid. Or burst into flames. Something about him makes me shiver at every touch. Every soft smile. Every single look. And this feeling... it only grows stronger, but what he did was unforgivable, and I'm not ready to forgive him yet.

"Well I'm ready now…" I say staring at him. I inch closer, until we're barley an inch apart. He looks at me and smiles softly, the kind of smile that stops me from breathing. But I push though it and wait for the question.

"I love you Cat... Do you love me?" He whispers in my ear, about to pull me in for a kiss, but gives me just enough time to answer.

"No." I whisper back, and I can feel every ounce of happiness drain from his body. "It was all just a game." I turn away and slid into my car. I start the engine, and as I pull back out of the spot I was in, I look at him. He was as white as a ghost, standing stiff, the color drained from his eyes. He looked as if her were dead, and with what I just did, he probably wished he was.

I drive 75 miles per hour down a dead end street and make a sharp turn onto the main road. I continue speeding up, until my gas light goes on. I was miles away from LA now, and I didn't intend on going back anytime soon. I had everything I needed with me, and I left everything I didn't need behind, including him. Finally, I pull the car off to the side of the road.

The past 13 years come back to me, and the over whelming feelings make the tears come streaming down my face even harder. I didn't think about what I did to him until now, and I feel absolutely horrible about it, but there isn't anything I could do now. I lean back, resting my head on the head rest, as the tears stream down my face.

I could feel the makeup running across my cheeks, but I didn't care. I just wanted to call him and tell him I loved him. I wanted to go back and hold him forever. I wanted to tell him I didn't mean any of it, but he would never forgive me. I broke his heart, and it was worse than what he did to me.

I wipe the tears away and start the engine. The gas light comes back on, so I drive for another mile and pull up to a gas station. The man outside from the convince store, then walks out.

"Are you okay miss?" He asks, looking concerned.

"Yes, I'm fine. Thank you." I say walking over to the pump and putting it in my car.

"No problem." He chuckles. He was about 25, with blond hair and brown eyes. He was pretty good looking too, but it wasn't time to think about that, especially after what I did.

"Oh, and do you know where the nearest hotel is?" I look over at him before he walks back in the store.

"It's about a mile up this road, on the right. But, um, I could bring you home tonight if you want?" He walks back over to me.

"No thanks perve." I get back in my car and drive off before he has the chance to get another foot closer to me.

The hotel was indeed a mile up the road, almost exactly. I park my car out from and walk in the main entrance. It was nice, but not amazing, just clean enough to stay in.

"Good evening." The man behind the desk says to me.

"Good evening. I'd like a room?" I question.

"Ok, and how long do you think you will be staying with us?" He asks.

"Indefinitely…" I whisper, as he hands me a key to room 213.

"Come back here when you're ready to check out. Would you like a tour?" He waves over the luggage man.

"No thanks." I say following the man to my room. He opens the door and places my things inside. The second he closes it behind him, I fall onto my bed and start sobbing again.

**I know it's short, and I know I probably pissed you off, and I know it's been awhile, but there will be more to come. School just ended and its been more busy now, than it has been for a while. I just finished 8****th**** grade, so there are way too many parties going on, and I'm planning mine, and ugh. Very stressful, because I'm trying to get the guy I like to come and ugh. Sorry. But yea, there will be more soon, I promise.**

**Happy summer! (4-ish days late… but yea)**

**REVIEW!**


	5. Chapter 5

"Hi, I'd like to check out?" I look over the counter at the same man who checked me in the night before. He chuckles a little bit before nodding.

"Only one night?" He asks typing something into his computer. He hands me a little white piece of paper. The one night only came out to 55 dollars with the 12 dollar meal I had last night. Not bad.

"Yea… I've decided it's time to get out of here; California that is." I smile back at him handing him the cash.

"Well have a nice trip to where ever you are going." The man gives me back my change.

I turn and walk out the door without a glance back. I just needed a little time away from things. There was less than a week left of school, and I could just say that I was sick. I'm sure my mom would back me up if I asked. But everything was getting too stressful. School, Robbie, life; it was too much.

I get in the car and start the engine. I connect my phone to the in-car blue tooth and call me mom.

"Hey sweetheart. I heard you left school early yesterday? Where are you? Are you okay?" She says after picking up practically before the first ring. I wouldn't be surprised if she were sitting by her phone all night.

"I needed to get out of there. I'm sorry I didn't call sooner… I checked into a hotel and stayed the night. I thought, maybe, if I went home, everyone would come to see if I were ok, and I don't want to deal with that." I explain.

I can hear the sign of relief over the phone, but she continues to ask the questions. "What happened? Did you and Jade fight again?"

"No… I wish. That's always easier. Robbie told me he loved me, and I wasn't ready to say it back…I didn't think he would get so mad, but he left me on the roof top alone and then today we…He just flipped on me because I wanted to forget about it, but then we started fighting and he yelled at me and then I yelled at him… He asked me again if I loved him, and I was so mad… I was so mad and I said, no, and I told him it was all just a game… The look on his face mom… I had to leave…" I cry to her, but I had to keep my eyes clear because I was driving.

"Oh baby… I'm so sorry. Are you going to come home soon?" She asks. I know she means well, but she just doesn't understand that I need to get out of here.

"No mom… I need you to do me a favor." I say quietly.

"Anything for you baby."

"I need you to call me out of the rest of school. Tell them I have mono or something… I can't go back and I can't stay here. I bought a plane ticket last night to New York, and I'm going to go. You need to understand this is the best thing I can do for myself right now." I whimper.

My mom sighs, and then says, "Ok…but why don't you talk to him first?"

"Because mom, I saw the look on his face. I told the guy who's loved me his whole life, that I don't love him and I was just screwing with him the whole time. I just want to go back to him and apologize and hold him and kiss him, but if I do, I'll be breaking his heart even more. I think the best thing for both of us, is some time apart."

"At least come home for a little bit," She pauses, "Let me drive you to the airport. This way you won't have to pay for parking, and we can talk a little bit more."

"Bring Jade and it's a deal." I smile a little bit and turn the car around. "I'll be home soon.

When I got home, my mom was waiting at the door. Jade was by her side, and there were 2 suitcases filled to the brim with my things. I couldn't help but smile. Jade opened the door and came running for me.

"Please don't go…" She begged, very unlike Jade.

"I have to." I explained.

"But I don't want you to." She whispered.

"I know it might be crazy of me saying this, but, come with me." I tell her pulling back from the hug.

"I figured you might say that. One of those suitcases in mine. I bought the ticket already too. Cat, are you sure you want to go?" She asks.

I nod, "Yes… I do."

The flight was quiet. I took the window seat from Jade and just stared out the window the entire time. My headphones were blasting music into one of my ears, but with all of the thoughts roaming around my head; it just went in and came back out the other ear. I still wasn't sure whether I wanted to leave or not. I just knew that leaving would give me some time to think, and thinking is what I needed most.

**_~ 1 Week Later (Still in NYC) ~_**

I heard a muffled sound out of Jade's room, so I walked over and stood by the door. It was a little hard to hear what she was saying, but I could figure it out. Then she said his name, and it was like every sense in my body was heightened. I heard ever word she said, and at times it made me blush. I missed Robbie. I really did, but I hurt him more than any human could take, and he would never take me back.

"Robbie, I know she hurt you…" Jade pauses, probably because he cut her off, but she continues, "I don't care! You mean the world to her and you know that. She was angry and upset. She didn't mean it! She's Cat!"

There was another pause before Jade continued, "She's been crying herself to sleep every night because of this."

I didn't know anyone heard it, but it was true.

"She just needs to go home. We all do. I thought a week would give her time to think and time to get her mind off of things, but it's only getting worse. You know you're the only one who can convince her to come home. She cares about you. More than anyone else we know… You're the only one she has ever truly cared about." Jade says through the phone. It took a long time until she spoke again and when someone says something that long, it can never be good.

Finally she sighs, and I can't tell if it's relief or giving up hope. "Ok…I'll try my best. Bye Robbie…"

I duck out of the door way and run towards the kitchen area. I pretend to drink some water as Jade comes walking out. She looks over at me and smiles. It looked like a sympathetic smile, but it was a smile none the less.

A few hours later, I walk back out of my room which I've been hiding in for the past 6 hours. Jade was standing in the kitchen texting someone, probably Beck.

"I'm sorry… that it's taking me so long to recuperate. I just… I'm not ready to go back. I loved him, I really did, and I wanted to say it back, but I don't know, maybe I wasn't ready." I say sitting down on the couch. Jade stands there with her arms crossed and relaxed.

She comes over to me, and sits down in the corner of the couch. I scoot closer to her and lay my head on her stomach, kicking my legs up onto the couch. I grab a pillow and hold it tight to my chest, trying my best not to cry again. But even if I did, I don't know if anything would come out.

"I know kid. You know the first time I told Beck I loved him, he made me say it over and over and over again, because he wanted to know that I was telling him the truth. And finally, I got sick of saying it, so I jumped on him and I kissed him. It shut him up because it wasn't like any of the other kisses… Cat, sometimes it's not about the words. We can say things as many times as possible and finally we convince ourselves its true. If you look at Robbie, and you hold him, or you kiss him, and you feel that something, it doesn't even compare to those 3 words." She explains.

"But he doesn't see it that way. He doesn't think I love him because I didn't say it back, but I have never felt this way about anyone before."I sniffle a little.

"Show him. Don't tell him, show him. We don't live forever Cat, so don't waste the time you have." Before getting up, she checks her phone and smiles. I sit up and stare at the blank TV.

Jade goes into her room, and shuts and locks the door. I sit there for another minute. I still wasn't dressed and it was about 5:30. My sweatshirt was sagging down past my shorts, making it look like I wasn't wearing any.

Someone knocks on the door, and despite my lazy slob look, I go to answer it. I unlock the door, and unbolt it.

"No… Don't do this to me again…" I say trying to shut the door, but he pushes it back open. He stares at me with those big brown eyes and the charming smile.

"I was wrong. I was wrong to have flipped on you at our dinner. I was wrong to have done half the things I did. And I'm sorry for most of them. I'm sorry for leaving you. I really am. And I know that you feel everything I do." He walks in and shuts the door behind him.

"Just stop Robbie. No matter what I feel, we're not safe. When we were just friends we could work it out, but now that we're more, things aren't the same. I warned from the beginning. We may look cute together, but whatever this is, wherever it may go, it will always end in a disaster." I tell him honestly. Brutal or not, it's true.

"I did the most dangerous thing I could when I told you I loved you, but it was worth it. I'm staying at a hotel a few blocks away. You have until tomorrow night to decide." He smiles a little bit.

"Decide what?" I spit back.

"We're never going to be safe…" He pauses looking me in the eyes. "So are you brave enough or aren't you? I'll be waiting at the top of the Empire State building." He turns around and walks towards the door.

"You can't "Affair to Remember" me!" I yell at him.

He opens the door, "If you're not there at 7:01 tomorrow," He pauses, "Then I promise you, I will close my heart to you forever."

He walks out and right before he shuts the door, I whisper, "I won't be there."

His faced drooped a little, but I could see the small amount of hope left in his eyes as he walked out. He was ready to get me back, but I don't know if I was ready to comply.

Jade runs out of her room and over to me. "Sooo…."

"I would imagine you were listening in…" I chuckle.

"Maybe…" She smiles. "I couldn't hear what you said at the end though. Come on! Give me all the details. I want his facial expressions and everything." Jade says eagerly.

"Facial expressions huh… Well he looked almost as bad as he did when I told him it was all a game…" I sit down slowly.

"Please tell me you didn't screw this up… Please." Jade sits next to me and takes my hand.

Something inside of me died a little bit when I saw him. The second I opened that door and my thoughts were answered, that light inside just went out. Maybe if it didn't I would have the hope I needed to go tomorrow, but I couldn't stand getting hurt again. Not like before. I knew it was a good idea to come here, and I'm starting to think it would be better to stay. Robbie and I aren't good together. Like I told him, as friends it would be easier to work things out, but when were like this, it's close to impossible.

Jade stares at me waiting for an answer. She looks like she's about to cry, but she holds it back because she knows it won't help. "No matter what I feel, we're not safe…I won't be there."

**I know its been a really really long time, like 2 weeks, and i'm really really sorry! I just haven't had the time i thought i would to write. Today was my first free day to do nothing. I've been doing some volunteering and them Field hockey and a bunch of family stuff. Then i had like a graduation party every other day on top of all this stuff. I think it's over though. Thank god.**

**Well hopefully you get really really mad at me for this chapter so that you will come back and read the next. I really like this story, and i think you will too! Thank you for putting up with my horrible, horrible spaz like updates. I will try my very best to get back into a routine. Thanks again!**

**REVIEW!**


	6. Chapter 6

"CAT!" Jade screams at me. "WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT!"

"I can't go though it again. I can't go though getting hurt like that. Do you understand how it feels to be left alone, to be given up on, because you weren't sure of how you felt? I'M IN LOVE WITH HIM! I AM, BUT… but…" I go and run off into my room sobbing.

Some people say you don't know what you have until it's gone, and now I'm starting to think they're right. He's given me so many chances to get him back, but I keep pushing him away. I keep thinking it will help me, it will keep me away from all of the pain, but it's not. I'm hurting myself more than our relationship ever could.

There's a slight knock on the door as it opens. Jade peaks her head in. "Hey… I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry…"

I flip over and bury my head in a pillow, refusing to talk to her. I manage to mumble out, "Go away."

"Cat…" Jade sits next to me on the bed and rubs my back slightly. "Talk to me. Don't yell, don't cry, just talk to me."

I roll back over and prop myself up

"I broke his heart after he broke mine, but I hurt him so much more than he could ever do to me. I don't deserve him, and he deserves someone so much better than me. I can't go, I just can't." I explain trying to hold back the tears.

"Cat, you and Robbie have something. I don't know what it is, I don't know how it happened, but it's something amazing. When you two are together, you bring out the best in each other. I've never see you happier, or smile more, or laugh as much as when your with him."

"Jade, I understand that you want me to be with Robbie, but I'm asking you, as your best friend, to side with me, and keep me away from the Empire state building." I beg her.

"I'm not going to do that. You're going to regret it, and I'm not going to be the one who stopped you." Jade says getting up and walking out of the room. She turns back and looks at me, "I hope you do the right thing, Cat."

I roll back over and bury my face into the pillow again. I let out a weird grumble before getting up and showering. I whisper to myself, "If she won't keep me from I him, I sure as hell will myself."

I sat in the shower until the water got cold, which ended up being about an hour and a half. Finally I get out and get dressed. I couldn't decide if it would be better to stay home or go out to distract myself. I sat down on my bed and turned on the TV. A good movie would be a great distraction. I flip through the movie channels and land on probably one of the most romantic movies ever, An Affair to Remember.

It was just too ironic, Robbie pulled this movie on me, and the same day I have to watch it. I change the channel because I can't deal with that movie, but when I get to the other channel, it's on there too.

"You're kidding me right?" I shout when I flip to HBO and it was playing on there too.

"Fine." I turn off the TV and flop backwards on the bed. "A nap would be cool too."

I shut my eyes, and the only thing in my head was him. The first time we met, the way I felt from then on, every party we went to, the sweet things he said to me. It just flooded my head like a hurricane would flood the streets. Was Jade right? Do we have something anymore?

It was 6:55, and I got up and looked out the window. I had a clear view of the Empire state building. I tried my hardest to not start crying when I saw it. I only had to choices right now. Stay here and let him go, or run as fast as I can, and give into the pain and torture. I wanted to give into him so badly, but he deserved so much more than me.

I did nothing but hurt him. I did nothing but confuse him. Yet he flew out here to fight for me, and I wasn't fighting for him.

The only possible thing I could do to keep my mind off of this whole thing was music. It was why I loved it so much. It took me to a completely different world.

I put my phone into the speakers and click shuffle. It take a moment for me to realize what song was playing, but then I hear Josh Groban's voice, and it clicks. If it couldn't be more ironic, his version of An Affair to Remember with John Williams.

"God damn it!" I my purse and run out the door, by the time I see the line of people waiting for taxis, it would take too long to wait. I had to go. I take off in a dead run down. I fly down 35th and turn on to 5th Ave. Almost getting hit by a taxi, I continue down the next block of 5th Ave until I come to a screeching halt in front of the empire state building. I push and shove my way through the crowd of people outside the doors. I get into the elevator to go to the observation desk. The woman who is selling the tickets doesn't even stop me, so I continue past her. I push through the glass doors to the deck.

I start running around looking at people, trying so hard not to start balling, but it was no use. I see a taller man with the thick dark curls on his hear and my heart skips a beat. He was dressed well, and just staring out at the skyline. The sun was just setting so it was an amazing sight, but there wasn't time to stop and look. I run over to him and turn him around by the shoulder.

"What the hell!" The man yells. He looks at me confused and shocked, and that's when I died inside. It wasn't him.

"I'm s-sorry… I thought y-you were someone else…" I turn and walk over to the doorman by the exit.

"Have you see a man about 6 feet tall with dark curly hair and glasses? I was supposed to meet him up here at 7. He might be carrying pink peonies?" I ask the man with a hopeless look on my face. I feel around for my phone in my back pocket, but it wasn't there. I left it in the hotel room when I left in such a rush.

"Do you happen to have the time?" He shows me his watch, and shakes his head. It was 7:35.

"I'm sorry miss…" He nods his head over to the corner of the observation deck where a garbage can sits.

I walk over to see a bouquet of beautiful pink peonies sitting in it on top of everything. I pick them up and hold them for a minute. I sink down to the ground with my back against the glass wall, and look out over the skyline as the sun dips down below the Hudson River. The tears start to fall when I finally realize, that this was it, and that I lost him forever.

I get up slowly and walk back to the elevator still holding the flowers as tightly as I could. When I get outside, I walk to the corner of 5th to get a taxi. I stick my hand out and wait for a car with its light on to come over. I slid into the seat and think for a minute.

"Where to?" The cabbie asks.

"The Fairfield Inn on West 37th." I answer. The cabbie starts the fair counter and pulls off of the curb. I sit with my head on the window. The cab stops on the curb again to let me out. I pull out my credit card and swipe it. I add an extra $5 because I was feeling generous. I get out and wave him off.

I stand looking up at the building. It took every ounce of my strength to walk through those doors. I walk over to the front desk and the woman running it looks up at me.

"Hi, how may I help you?" She smiles.

"I'm here to visit a friend. Robert Shapiro?" I tell her. "I was supposed to meet him at the Empire state building, but I was late and he left and I really, really need to see him."

"Hey… Don't cry. I'll get you his room number honey." She types something into the computer and looks at me and smiles. "Go up to floor 4 and its right across from the elevator. Room 311."

"Thank you…" I sulk over to the elevator and make my way up to the 4th floor. The doors open and I'm left staring at a door marked 311. I knock softly.

The door unlocks and Robbie is standing in front of me, no shirt and in boxers. I then realize I've been holding my breath since I got in the elevator. I grip the flowers tightly in my hands behind my back.

"Cat, what are you doing here?" He sounded a little worried.

"What are you doing? You sound worried. Is there someone else in there?" I chuckle.

"No, nobody." He pauses and lets me in. "Sorry, but I didn't expect to see you tonight… Or ever again actually."

I bring the flowers out and around my body and hold them out a little bit. He smiles widely and looks at me in complete shock.

"You went." He chuckles still in shock of me being there with him.

"I'm sorry I was so late. I don't know what I was thinking. I thought that I didn't deserve someone as great as you. I mean you fought for me… every waking minute. And then you flew out here and continued to fight even after I ran away. I hurt you but your fought for me." I explain.

He lets out a loud but short sigh of relief, then I continue, "I wasn't going to show up. Every bone in my body tried to slow me. Every voice in my head screamed don't."

"But?" He asks.

"But I didn't listen. Every channel I wanted to watch was playing An Affair to Remember, and then the first song that came on when I was trying to distract myself was the same thing. The world was telling me to go, but my brain was telling me not to. So instead, I decided to follow my heart. I followed my heart because I love you." I smile. He takes my hand and kisses it. His smile was ear to ear.

"I can't deny that our path has been complicated, but in the end, love makes everything simple…" I continue. Robbie cuts me off before I can go on.

"Cat, just shut up and kiss me." He says leaning in and caressing my head softly. Our lips meet and it was one of the most amazing feelings I've ever had. It wasn't a long kiss, there wasn't any tongue, it was short and sweet and full of emotion. It was all I needed right now.

We pull apart and into a tight hug. "Why don't I make you a drink."

"Ok…" I sigh sitting down on his couch.

"I'll get some music. My ipod is in my room." He says handing me a martini, knowing that's one of my favorites.

He hurries off to his room, and I sip my drink slowly with my eyes shut. I hear a click, and turn my head to see where it came from. Robbie was still in his room, and the door was open, and I swore it was a door shutting.

I push aside the feeling and go back to my drink. He comes back out and puts on some slow music. We just sit for a while, enjoying the company of each other's arms. It was the best feeling I have ever had.

Robbie and I stand outside my hotel for a moment just looking at each other. "Despite the false start we had earlier, this night has been perfect." I tell him.

"Well there is one that that can make it even better." He lets out a deep and heavy breath. "I am so sorry for the pain that I have caused you. And I know that I cannot take it back but I want to try and make it up to you. Even if it take me the rest of my life. Cat will y—" Before he can finish his sentence, a man about 6 foot 2, comes over and take a right hook right to Robbie's jaw. A little black box goes flying out of his hand and slides across the floor.

"What the hell! Have you lost your mind!" I shout at the man who just superman punched my boyfriend.

A girl walks over to the man and stands holding his arm. As Robbie gets up the man points at Robbie, "You! Tell her!"

"Tell me what? What's going on?!" I look at both of them and then at the girl. She was crying and her makeup was running down her face. Robbie stared at me.

"I'm sorry… I just… You left me there all alone, and… and I was angry. I thought you didn't love me. You didn't call or text me and I thought… I thought it was over." Robbie looks down at his feet and back up at me; his eyes red and watery.

"You didn't…" I say shaking my head slightly. I didn't want to believe it. It couldn't be true. He loved me and he said he would never hurt me again…

"Cat…"

"You did!" I start to cry, but the anger take over and I could feel the fire inside. I look over at the girl who couldn't be 17. She was around 15 or 16 with a lot of make up on. "You… You get out of here now!"

The girl turns and walks away with the man I presume to be her brother. "And not just out of here. Off this island. I'm not going back to LA anymore. And if I ever see you again… I will end you."

Jade comes walking out of the building and over next to me. She looks at me and then at Robbie. She sees the girl and her brother walking away. "Oh my god, Cat, are you okay?"

Robbie is still just staring at me, and the hurt and pain in his eyes says enough. For once, I don't feel bad though. I couldn't feel better to say what I'm about to say.

"I thought that you didn't love me anymore. I didn't care if I lived or died. That girl, Cassie, was just—" I cut him off.

"DON'T SAY HER NAME!" I scream at him. "Or anything else to me… every again. According to me, this night… it never happened. And this 'us' we keep talking about, never will. Now get out of here…" I say emotionless. He turns and walks away. Jade was just looking at me, heartbroken for me, but there was no way anyone could understand the way I felt right now.

I stand there silent and completely still. Jade tries to pull me inside, so I could be somewhere I could yell and scream and cry; but I wouldn't let that happen, because that mean he won.

I walk over to the little black box that flew to the ground when Robbie did. I kneel down and pick it up. I didn't want to open it, because I knew what it was, I knew what it meant, and I knew it wasn't true. It took every ounce of strength to knock on Robbie's door tonight, and it take ever single drop I have left to open this box and face the lie I've been living for the past 13 years.

The box folds open and inside was a ring with at least a 2 carat diamond on it. At that moment, my heart shattered into a million pieces and flew across the ground. Everything I wished for, every fairytale I have always wanted, every love story I wished for, was taken away from me and ripped in half. And it could never be put back together.

**So I made this chapter a little longer for two reasons, one, to make up for the fact that I haven't been updating as much as I could be, and two, so that in the next chapter, you won't have to hate me as much as you do for this one.**

**So listen, I know that this really did piss you off, and I know that I'm probably going to have at least 5 hit men at my door by the end of today, but a story needs conflict to be worthwhile. So I would appreciate it if I didn't have hire assassins at my door tonight haha.**

**You know you love me, and you know you always end up liking my stories, so REVIEW!**


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